Blogpost #1

This is for the guys that I left in the dust. You know who you are. The ones on earth, languishing in jobless misery.

That's the joke, though, right? I have a job, and it's the worst. I hate working in space. You know how they say that it's the people who make the job? Whoever said that sucks, because its true. My captain (Capn' Crunch, hahaha) thinks I'm his personal punching bag. The comm tech hates my guts.

But hey, that's life, right? I get to see the universe!

Ha. This is how I see the universe:

So I wake up in the middle of the night to an alarm blaring like crazy, and so, duh, I sit up in my bunk. Except my bunk is right next the the ceiling, so I hit my head. Whoever thought up the cabin design is the worst. So, with stars and moons and stuff spinning around my head, I climb down and try to see in the dark. It's hard, and my eyes aren't doing so well seeing with my concussion going on at the back of my head.

I manage to pull on my boots and stumble out from my closet of a cabin into the hallway. I'm basically freaking out. Seriously, I've been in space for four weeks, and this has never happened before. Ever. So, yeah, out in the hallway cabin is this other guy. I call him the Hulk, cause he's like a pillar of muscle. Probably the captain's bodyguard. Hahaha.

The Hulk is standing in the hallway in his red jumpsuit looking like he's got a class A hangover and gonna fall over. I probably look the same, so I'm not worrying about that.

"Hey, Travis!" (That's the Hulk's name)

Travis focuses his beady eyes on me like I'm this huge chunk of meat. Yeah, a chunk of meat in a purple sleep jumpsuit. I'm the only one who wears purple to sleep, and there's this whole thing with jumpsuits that I don't feel like explaining right now.

So Travis stares at me for forever and I say, "What's the alarm for?"

Travis grabs onto this thought and stands up straighter, beginning to stomp over to me. "You made the noise?"

Uh-oh. I step backwards and I'm thinking I'll hide in my cabin awhile. "No, it's not that. I don't know WHO made it."

Travis doesn't get it. All that muscle takes time to process complex thoughts like that. "You make it shut up!"

I turn to run back to my room, but he's too quick and he sticks me into noogie position. My neck is all but snapped when I hear a new voice.

"The noise is the alarm for docking at the spaceport, idiots."

Travis lets me go to look for the speaker (or because of her charming powers of reason) and I'm able to see a girl in a labcoat.-- a med aide There are so many med aides on this ship, it's the best. Especially the best when they don't try to help you when you've got a concussion and a sprained neck.

"Amateurs." The girl says.

What the heck is up with that? She's like, "I'm from Star Trek and I own this ship, and you're the idiot newbie, like some stupid lieutenant."

I'm new, yeah. Deal with it, girl. Alarms at night are kind of weird. Oh, yeah, I forgot. I was supposed to know what they were automatically, from the vulcan mind-meld everyone but me did when they signed up for a job on this ship.

Life sucks here, guys. The only great thing is the stars. They're so close.

-Terry S.